Regaining Trust

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There are lots of ways to get better at building and sustaining trusting relations. One specific activity that can lead to growth in this area is taking the initiative to make peace with someone that you have not gotten along with in the past or someone who you feel may have been disappointed in you or your work. Here are the steps. 

  1. Identify the person that you would like to have a better relationship with. 

  2. Start a journal where you note the steps you are taking, the feelings this is creating in you, the reactions of the other person and its impact on you. 

  3. Identify the things that you believe influence this relationship in a way that makes it difficult for both of you. This could be a dishonest exchange from the past, different styles, competition, aggressive or passive behavior. 

  4. Think about the positive qualities that this person has and the positive contributions that they make to the organization and the work or others. 

  5. Schedule an appointment with the person and give them a heads up that you would like to discuss if you should improve your relationship and how you can go about it. 

  6. In the conversation with them be honest, “I don’t think we have always gotten along and I would value seeing if we can change this for our mutual benefit and for the organization.” Stop there and see what you get back from them. 

  7. If you get an affirming response that they agree, let the next step be to focus on positive ways to improve as you go forward, do not go back into the past and issues just now. If you see hesitancy or reluctance, ask them to think about it and let you know if it is something that they might value as well.